Maybe, understanding your neighbour is more important than love

It's bullshit when people talk about loving your neighbourhoods.


People cant love a community they aren't close to. You need love potions for that.


What's more important is understanding each other.




Source: Muslims and non-muslims breaking fast together



Relationship Goal 1: Empathy – do not give up in trying to understand each other

Human relationships break down because people become tired of wanting to understand each other, or refuse to understand each other.

You might say, “I don’t want to understand my neighbour anymore because he is such an ass”. It is however, important to place yourself in the shoes of your neighbour, and understand why he acts the way he does.

Did he use a bamboo pole to knock your ceiling because he is a light sleeper and you were making too much noise? Did he not know how to approach you, and finds it embarrassing that he has such a “weakness”?

Sometimes, our ego gets in the way and we stop trying to understand each other. To better understand your neighbour, try to put yourself in their shoes. Hopefully they don’t wear the ones below ;)

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Relationship Goal 2: Social behaviours are sometimes implicit – learn to probe

The old joke that women always don’t mean what they say, that they are fine with it when they are not, is sometimes true. But that might apply to men too. And, your neighbours.

Learn not to just hear a person. Demonstrate an interest, be just that little bit warmer to your neighbours, ask and understand. Probe and observe a little bit – just like that sweet neighbour here.

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Relationship Goal 3: Win-win situations are favoured by all

Approach your neighbour should there be a win-win situation. Sometimes, your mother may help to take care of the neighbour’s kids because she is bored; and the neighbour’s granny might be exhausted. Missy HSB isn’t asking neighbours to make use of each other. However, these common platforms help relationships to get better.

Look at these Tanjong Pagar residents jio-ing each other to watch movies together. This is a win-win situation!

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Relationship Goal 4: Don’t hold grudges

Grudge-holders might amplify their grievances and intensify their hurt, prolonging their own suffering to let others (especially the wrong-doer) know that they have been mistreated.

To let go of your grudges, identify your triggers – know what it is that made you unhappy.

Did your neighbour apologise inadequately for what he had done wrong? Was it a misunderstanding? Were you being insensitive?

Acknowledge that feeling, then talk to your neighbour. Else, put a time limit to it and let the past stay in the past. These grudges get in the way of progress – progression of relationship, your life, your relationship with your neighbours.

Let it go.

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Relationship Goal 5: Communication is a two-way street

To establish trust between neighbours, we have to reveal part of ourselves. When our neighbour read us, are given an insight to who is the ‘real’ us, they open up to us, and will feel more comfortable. As they become more comfortable, they open up more to us.

Here are some tips to improve relationships with your neighbours! May this bring more harmony to your neighbourhood in the new year (:

All I want for Christmas is you~

Christmas is a time to gift your loved one with something he or she wouldn’t fork out for, for getting a nicer version of an item he needs or loves.

It is also even to buy something you want and like, but knowing that you wouldn’t buy it for yourself; and knowing that someone else would definitely like it (complicated, but true!)

 

1. Pets

Why do we love our pets so?

 

The happiness of our pets isn’t complicated the way human happiness is. And when we see them happy, we are happy too.

 

Mr HSB, can I get a dachshund for Christmas this year? *puppy eyes*

 

One important note though: Do not buy a pet if you cant be responsible for its happiness and well-being. And make his Christmas, by adopting him from a local shelter.

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2. A survival kit for work/school

With school starting soon, your kid will be happy with a Christmas/back-to-school survival kit. 

Show your kid/girlfriend your love by remembering what she likes and make her happy with her favourite mid-noon snack or her favourite figurine. Take time to assemble it.

Also, add on personalised messages for each:

Instead of “Is your dad a baker? Cos you’ve got great buns”, say “I will be the cheese to my hun-bun bun, sticky and gooey and being your favourite sun”.

Just kidding, but think of a message for each item!

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3. Lunch bags

There are two ways to read this. You can get her a cute bag for her to put her wallet, phone, tissues in when she goes for lunch, or make her a packed lunch and put it in a lunch bag on Christmas Eve.

Yes, girls find their man cute when they don the apron. A man who cooks, always earns an extra brownie point for me!

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4. Smartphone Attachable Lens-style Camera

This works for girls (and guys) who want to experiment with DSLR – simply mount these lens to your smartphone to capture DSLR-standard pictures and videos, and share them with your friends and family afterwards.

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5. Luggage Covers

Had enough of unfurling the plastic wrap that your girlfriend paid for at the airport? Get her a pretty luggage cover to protect her luggage from the elements.

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A little more about the author

Missy HSB will also be writing for HSB in future, if you have been keeping up with our HSB posts. She grew up in the era of Missy Elliot, an American rapper, and Adee. She also likes it that Missy Elliot is different, strong and excels in what she does. She doesn’t like the term Mrs because it makes her feel old, and hence chose Missy – her go-to term when she scolds anyone ;)

Farting cows, sinking countries and smog-filled skies

The COP21 was a massive United Nations conference which involved delegates of 195 nations: world leaders and experts, and culminated after one year of negotiations.  The Paris Agreement was sealed on 12 Dec.  

 

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Exploring the COP21 and its “positive energy”

A few basic facts of COP21 – promise they are easily digestible, and you wouldn’t be farting afterwards ;)

1. COP21 refers to the 21^st Conference of Parties to the UN Framework Convention on Climate Change

2. World has already warmed by almost 1° C (the average warming over pre-Industrial Revolution levels)

3. Limit global warming by setting a temperature cap of 2°C, or better yet, an aim of 1.5°C. Failing which, there will be catastrophic climate change - countries like Bangkok and island states may sink faster or be engulfed. Seas will rise, droughts, floods and storms will worsen.

4. Slashing or eliminating the use of renewable energy (coal, oil, gas) and switching to cleaner sources (solar and wind, and improving energy efficiency)

5. Limit amount of greenhouses gases emitted by human activity to the same level that trees, soils and oceans can absorb naturally, beginning at some point between 2050 and 2100. [Did you know that fires in SE Asia have released more than a gigatonne of carbon dioxide this year. Gigatonne?!?!?]

6. The developed world will provide $100 billion a year to poorer nations to help the latter switch from fossil fuels to greener sources of energy and adapt to the effects of climate change 

7. For the first time, all countries will be required to report on “national inventories of emissions by source”

Source: AFP

 

We’ll be sharing what you can do, as an individual to help protect Mother Earth, so do look out for it. We can’t evoke a huge change like the governments, to implement such large-scale efforts. But do you realise that without our individual efforts, without the efforts of considerate and Earth-friendly business owners, without the enthusiasm of the school children, the governments can’t do it themselves too?  

 

 

 

 

 

Would you prefer if your neighbour lives near you, or away from you?

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As a child growing up in Singapore, I was used to living in close quarters with my neighbours. I didn’t like to bring my keys around – I was afraid to lose them. I used to remember sitting on my slippers outside home, then having my neighbours invite me into their houses.

That’s the beauty of living in Singapore heartlands. You don’t have sheep or animals as neighbours, or only have your neighbour 7 miles down the road. You have them, right by you.

Singapore Matters shared a story about Mr Chua, who may not be as handsome as the “Shop Theft is a Crime” cardboard standee policeman or Captain America, but definitely proving that every man, or woman deserves a hero in your weakest moment.

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Mr Chua’s bravery shielded his elderly neighbour from the blows of her son when he gets angry. Her son suffers from mental health issues, and whenever he turned aggressive, she would run to his house – always open – to seek for refuge.

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By knowing our neighbours beyond the everyday hello in the lift, it makes it easier to empathise with each other and temper such situations with kindness. We understand why others react the way they do – maybe curry brings back bad memories, or someone’s a very light sleeper. We can relate better to one another, and realise that hey, maybe, we all have fears, struggles and aspirations; and like each other, we all want that helping hand in a moment we most needed it.

In another incident where family was the perpetrator of hurt, one that saw how citizen journalism was actually useful instead of just stomping on others (pun intended). A Mohammad Juani Ali, helped exposed terrible deeds a 58 year-old lady was subjected to. The daughter and husband of an old lady had abused the old lady, slapping her, pulling her hair, hitting her with a broom. Sometimes, blood does not run thicker than water.

We are neighbours not by chance, but we are friends by choice.

These “Steady Neighbour” posts [1], [2] reminds us what it means to  be a Steady Neighbour (:

Remember, living in an urban environment, and interacting with others might bring about problems. It is however, essential to manage and bridge these differences. 

MediShield Life – What you need to know about it to be set for, well… LIFE.

We’ve all heard it – MediShield Life was launched on 1 November 2015. This scheme was rolled out with the aim of protecting all Singapore Citizens and Permanent Residents against large medical bills for life, regardless of their age or health condition.

Despite all the anxieties on the affordability of this new scheme, the Gahmen will help ensure MediShield Life premiums remain affordable by everyone through various premium subsidies and support measures.

Have some burning questions about MediShield Life?

Lai lai, let us give you the lowdown on what’s the buzz about MediShield Life.

1) Come again, what is MediShield Life?

As the name suggests, it covers you for life. Coverage for all Singapore Citizens and Permanent Residents has already started automatically on 1 November 2015.

No application needed as it already includes those currently covered by MediShield, private health insurance plans, the uninsured and those who may already have serious medical conditions.

You been to watch Cirque Du Soleil? MediShield Life is just like the safety net below the acrobats to cushion their fall, which in our case are the large medical bills.

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2) I can't afford the higher premiums how?

Fret not, the Government will offer subsidies for lower and middle income groups. Besides, our annual MediSave contributions are more than enough to pay for these premiums. Don’t worry!

If you are Pioneer Generation, even more hosay! Coz you will get additional subsidies!!

With the Pioneer Generation Subsidies and Medisave top-ups, all Pioneers will pay less for MediShield Life than for MediShield today.

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3) Is the coverage good or not?

 If you are happy to share a ward with others in a public hospital and is not choosy with the doctors attending to you. You are definitely well-covered :))

If you are more ATAS, there is always the Integrated Shield Plan (IP), which is already owned by many Singaporeans who can afford higher premiums. These private hospitalisation plans consists of a basic MediShield component and an additional private insurance component. 

As such, there is no duplication in coverage between MediShield and IPs.

Need more assurance on IPs? Check with your agent lor! He/she will inform you of the total premium that you have to pay, including the portion of premium for MediShield Life. They will settle for you and channel this portion of premium for MediShield Life to CPF Board. There will be no double payment of the MediShield Life premium.

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4) How do I know how much my premiums will cost?

There’s a premium calculator online to help you calculate the estimated premiums payable after subsidies. Hosay right?

Click here to calculate your premiums. 

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5) Can I go for plastic surgery or dental treatment with my MediShield Life coverage?

Well, let’s just say that the scheme covers more of the costs of critical illness treatments such as chemotherapy, implants and kidney dialysis as compared to the previous MediShield scheme. 

I mean, what’s the use of Andy Lau’s nose when your kidneys don’t work like they used to before?

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6) Is there a lot of “hair-pulling” paperwork involved?

Applying for subsidies is easy peasy! The Government will use the information already in their databases to determine your eligibility for the Premium Subsidies.

The subsidies will be applied AUTOMATICALLY.

When you wanna submit your claims, just inform the staff member at public hospital handling your admission that you wish to claim from MediShield.

So simple, right?

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Still have more questions about MediShield Life?

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This is a public service announcement: 

You may either look for one of the 400 grassroots leaders who attended a dialogue with the Health Minister to better explain the policy to you.

Or alternatively, you may make an appointment in advance at selected Community Clubs and Residents’ Committee (RC) Centres to have a free one-on-one MediShield Life consultation with a volunteer from the Financial Practitioners Association of Singapore (IFPAS). It is currently avaialble at the following GRCs:

• Ang Mo Kio GRC
• Bishan-Toa Payoh GRC
• Chua Chu Kang GRC
• Marine Parade GRC
• Nee Soon GRC 
• Tampines GRC

The consultation sessions are held every Monday between 7pm and 9.30pm. 

We “gope” the above info from the Channel News Asia reports;p hehe…

Don’t say we never share ya!!

Do 1-2 rotten apples REALLY spoil the whole bunch? EXCLUSIVE Conspiracy theory reveal!!

Have you ever found yourself in a group whereby one person’s negativity affected everyone in the group?

Today we go behind the scenes at this website.

Long story short – one bad apple is just one bad apple. But the insidious part of it is dear readers, are the PEOPLE WHO ARE KEEN TO SPREAD THE NEWS ON THE OTHER APPLES (and labelling them just as rotten).

Poor innocent apples.

The research shows the positive mindset makes a difference – we are all discerning readers and thinkers (foreign friends always say that Singaporeans they meet have a good head on their shoulders!). Are we so easily misled by the one bad Grassroots leader or one errant volunteer?

I think not. I think we owe it to the nameless auntie who cleans the vegetable garden at the community plot near my HDB block and the toothless uncle at the CC who always helped me with the badminton courts.

Let us all be a bit more discerning and positive.

Oops… Found out that the “toothless” uncle had forgotten his dentures for that day, so he is technically not toothless, my apologies. :)